Stupid Windoze!

So you can read, and PLAY an AIF file, but you can't burn it for me?

Bah.

Dear John

So you find "negative to and fro very draining" do you?

Well, you know what? There's a VERY easy way to avoid it.

Either you can flop over like a little emo boy, and whinge about "bad vibes" - or else you can handle conflict like a man, accept responsibility when you've done something wrong, and take steps to ensure that you don't affect other people negatively in the first place.

you FUCKING cow

Why don't you just quit already instead of dragging us all into your juvenile shit?

But it's not even 10:30!

Friday, Waterloo pulls a sickie.
Over the weekend get call at 5pm on Saturday, asked to come into work.
Politely say no, too inebriated.
Get text message of instructions for Monday on Sunday night. Irritated, but whatever.
Monday, Waterloo comes in and hasn't even turned her computer on before she's stomped off to HR to bitch.
Then she comes back and storms out.
And then HR calls and says she hasn't been down there at all.
Fuck. Ing. Hell.

"it's been a less than brilliant day!"

8:45 - Free-standing bus ticket machine eats all change for bus pass.
9:07 - Bus passes stop by three blocks
9:26 - Deputy the Man rolls in with bloodied page and accuses me of Waterlooesque professionalism despite page being created on day after 14-hour day
11:00 - desk meeting with instructions to document our day, every day
12:06 - Realise like Paris Hilton single
13:24 - Waterloo discovers chocolate brownie biscuits on my desk, demands one. Or two. Or 15.
15:00 - Receive email stating Blowjob Mouth will now be Team Liaison
16:39 - Finish last chocolate brownie biscuit

This day will undoubtedly get worse.

Argh, I'm An Idiot

I'm just suffering from verbal diorrhea today, and shooting my mouth off all over the place, speaking before I've considering what I'm saying and getting in all kinds of trouble and confusing everyone around me.

Just shut me up, OK? Take away the submit button before I push it.

we're got new templates!

QWIJTGOEMV3';smv'p;kw34=-9o!*&*£&^@*&^@!(*%^£(*&!

Who do you think you are?

You know, it's bad enough I already knew you had a cat before you told me, because you smell LIKE CAT PISS, it's bad enough I have to listen to your hacking, phlegmy coughs EVERY FREAKING DAY, it's bad enough you look like Jack Klugman in a blonde wig and a skirt, but now I have to put up with your complete lack of respect?

I like how you folded like a deck chair when I walked over and confronted you in front of everyone. You know, the same way you belittled me in front of everyone.

Here's a fucking newsflash for you, you aren't my boss. We're both equals. Well, ok, I'm better than you are. But we're still technically the same level. I have two bosses, and you aren't one of them.

Pull that shit again on me, and you can believe I will have your head, and your job, and I'll have a peer who ISN'T a chain smoking gargoyle.

oh, NOW you care?

Now? NOW you fucking care?

Oh, and don't think I haven't heard why exactly what it is that you think is holding us back.

Whingiest Blog In The World

This is a blog. It is DESIGNED for whinging. If you do not like the whinging then DO NOT READ BLOGS!!!

Moran.

Guest List Hogs

So we've got a limited number of guest list spots for our next show. Five places - you know, ONE EACH for the members of the band and the manager.

SO DON'T GO GIVING YOUR SPOT AWAY AND THEN AUCTIONING ALL THE OTHER SPOTS WHICH ARE NOT YOURS TO SODDING RANDOMS OFF MYSPACE!!!!!!

humph

when you hold the door open for someone, they should walk through it, instead of opening the other door and wasting your time.
that's what i think. bastards.

Down

ILX is down. Has been for hours.

What on earth did I come in to work for, if not for the free interwebs?

Bah!

license

If celebrities can control how their image is used and license it, I think that means I can decide whether unflattering photos of me fall under my control. Especially photos taken without my permission.

MOTHER PUSS BUCKET

So I ask the tax office, when doing all of my tax stuff, do I need to fill out a form for 2006?
They say no.
So I go down to the office -- taking a half day off to do it, no less -- last Wednesday. They fill out my forms and send them in.
I come home from work and guess what is waiting for me:
the tax return for 2006.
FUCK YOU, YOU FUCKING FUCKS!

humph

I'm bored of dealing with your irritation over someone else. You want to be irritated with me, that's fine. But if you're going to be pissy to/at me because someone else is bothering you then go downstairs and kick some bins. I'm left in this constant state of feeling like everything I do is going to set one of you off and I KNOW that's not because *I* am so incredibly irritating that every little thing I do is magic annoying.
And the least you could do is be gracious about an apology for a misunderstanding.

I'm not your girlfriend; I'm not your mum. I don't get paid to love you unconditionally.

Interviewers who ask you if you're still interested in the position, tell you the lack of a degree is not a deal-breaker, tell you they'll have an answer in a few days, and then completely blow you off.

WHAT THE FUCK?

If I wanted to feel like a jilted prom date, I'd go apply at a fast food joint!

yeah, hi

Could you BACK THE FUCK UP OUT OF MY PERSONAL LIFE?
Right. Thanks very much for that.

If I'm So Creepy...

Why are *you* reading my blog, eh, stalker?

DVLA, you suck

I took another half day off from work to go down to bloody Wimbledon to show them my passport in person so I didn't have to put it in Royal Mail since my passport has my residency sticker in it and is my only form of identification.
And not only did he go, "Sorry, we don't exchange American driver's licenses," as though America was some kind of whacked-out place that doesn't have traffic or cars or roads and lord knows after driving the Dan Ryan every day for FIVE YEARS I certainly can't handle the B roads of Britain, thus I have to get a learner's permit and sit the exams yadda yadda, he then TOOK MY BLOODY PASSPORT *and* charged me the extra in-person premium service fee!
Why?
"We have to send it to Swansea to be checked. You'll get in back in two to three weeks."
But I came HERE to avoid doing that!
"Sorry."


* Not fucking sorry at all, actually.